Before I was diagnosed with mental illness, I would read a book a week.
I remember reading The Hunger Games in 4 days – it was genuinely one of those books I couldn’t put down.
After a while, completing one book took me weeks, those weeks turned into months and after a while, I gave up.
It was so frustrating having to re-read pages and paragraphs, whatever I read wouldn’t register in my mind.
Sounds ridiculious as I’m sure there were plenty other “signs” but this was when I realised something was wrong.
At my first GP appointment, I mentioned that I hadn’t been able to read a book in almost a year and was surprised when she told me this was “completely normal”.
Turns out my brain was swimming in enough information that the romance between Katniss and Peta was all just too much for it take on.
So, years have gone by and I haven’t read a book…which is ironic as I work in Communications.
I’ve had CBT, I’ve taken the meds and I’ve tried therapy.
Did they help?
Well, yes. To a degree but it’s taken me three years to get back into reading.
Over the weekend I visited a spa and read over 300 pages of Jodi Picoult’s Small Little Things. 300 pages!
I got so into it that I’m delighted to let you know that I finished the book last night.
I withdrew it from the library a month ago and I’m still on a high from finishing it.
It might have taken me a while (& a few library renewals) but, and this is the most important, I did it.
My brain retained all the information! Woohoo!
It’s a small victory but one that means the world.
I’m not “cured” and I’ll always struggle with my mental health but this is a sign of how far I’ve come.
Being able to sit still and read over 300 pages in 2 days has got me very excited!
I’ll be taking out the next library book this week so if you have any recommendations then please do comment and let me know.
Here’s to the next one.