The little victories 

Before I was diagnosed with mental illness, I would read a book a week. 

I remember reading The Hunger Games in 4 days – it was genuinely one of those books I couldn’t put down. 

After a while, completing one book took me weeks, those weeks turned into months and after a while, I gave up. 

It was so frustrating having to re-read pages and paragraphs, whatever I read wouldn’t register in my mind. 

Sounds ridiculious as I’m sure there were plenty other “signs” but this was when I realised something was wrong. 

At my first GP appointment, I mentioned that I hadn’t been able to read a book in almost a year and was surprised when she told me this was “completely normal”. 

Turns out my brain was swimming in enough information that the romance between Katniss and Peta was all just too much for it take on.  

So, years have gone by and I haven’t read a book…which is ironic as I work in Communications. 

I’ve had CBT, I’ve taken the meds and I’ve tried therapy. 

Did they help? 

Well, yes. To a degree but it’s taken me three years to get back into reading. 

Over the weekend I visited a spa and read over 300 pages of Jodi Picoult’s Small Little Things. 300 pages! 

I got so into it that I’m delighted to let you know that I finished the book last night. 

I withdrew it from the library a month ago and I’m still on a high from finishing it. 

It might have taken me a while (& a few library renewals) but, and this is the most important, I did it. 

My brain retained all the information! Woohoo!

It’s a small victory but one that means the world. 

I’m not “cured” and I’ll always struggle with my mental health but this is a sign of how far I’ve come. 

Being able to sit still and read over 300 pages in 2 days has got me very excited! 

I’ll be taking out the next library book this week so if you have any recommendations then please do comment and let me know. 

Here’s to the next one. 

6 thoughts on “The little victories 

  1. Love this post! Amazing and such a pleasure to read (lol sorry awful pun not intended). Reading has been something I’ve found a bit tough since being diagnosed. I don’t really think it’s the bipolar, I reckon it’s actually just the meds… but anyway gives me hope I can be a big reader again! X

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The same thing happened to me! I used to read constantly but now I feel so stressed and restless, I’ve had the same book for over a month that I can’t be bothered to read. How did you manage to get back in to reading?

    Like

    1. It’s taken me some time so don’t be disheartened. I think being away over the weekend gave me that opportunity. Also, switching my phone off worked wonders. I gave myself a social detox of sorts over the weekend and so I guess, the time I would have spent on my phone, I actually spent reading. Hope this helps? 💙

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That is really helpful! Since I’ve started blogging I’ve been on my phone way more often, sort of a blessing and a curse really. I’m getting into the habit of scheduling tweets to try to cut down. Thank you

        Liked by 1 person

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